Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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