not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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