Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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