He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
