can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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