I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
