READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
