I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
