and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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