You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize