In the future we'll all be gay
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Operation Purity has been aborted
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
