i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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