Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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