guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
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