So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize