You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Randomize
