Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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