Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
