i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
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