So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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