When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
