I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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