Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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