Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
