I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize