I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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