areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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