oh fat girl friday strikes again...
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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