i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
