Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize