How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Randomize
