i think my tv is drunk
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
