Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
