so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
