butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
