do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
