the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
