bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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