It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
