I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
