It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize