is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
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