forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
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