I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
