I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
