So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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