just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
