btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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