So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize