Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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